Tuesday, April 18, 2006
EXTREME RUGBY TRAINING & EARLY HIBERNATION
Been a while since the last entry due to an unforseen & unexpected incident on the last Moomins M.C. outing.On March 18th John, Gino, Allan, Sydney Geoff, myself & Adam ( Kerry's other half ) took off on a overnight trip to the state border. Geoff had just got back from his Tassie trip and we were going to escort him half way back to Sydney along some interesting roads. The plan was to then head back to Melbourne along more interesting roads.
I'm writing this on a laptop kindly lent to me by science officer / i.t. officer Brenton as I have been forced into early hibernation for this winter.
Unlike the moomins, I haven't gutsed myself on pine needles, opting for large doses of morphine to ease myself into the endless weeks of lying snugly in bed.
Remembering how the weekend in the Grampians National Park I was thinking my fitness levels weren't quite up to scratch, a new fitness regime was in order. One that perhaps involved quitting smoking even!
We all met up at Allan's place and before we could get out of greater Melbourne area the solution was thrust into my consciousness!
EXTREME RUGBY TRAINING!!!!!
A good rugby player will posses a certain amount of strength & stamina, so why not take it one notch further. Seeing as I didn't have a rugby side at my disposal to practice scrums or tackles I went for the next best thing.....the side of a semi trailer.
Maybe I was a bit too keen to rectify my current fittness deficiency and chosen one that wasn't moving........probably would have been a good idea to get off the motorbike first too. So kids, don't try that one at home, alright!
As I entered a left hand bend, I was greeted by a semitrailer carting potatoes. Nothing unusual there except for its front wheel being over the centre line and making progress towards me at a great rate of knots!
Now, becoming a bonnet ornament on some spud truckie's pride & joy held about as much appeal as running into that large escaped rapist, I saw on crimestoppers, in a dark alleyway.
So I deftly cut the corner in order to continue on my merry little way. All good bar some elements of physics, which were about to make themselves very troublesome.
Anyone who's ever seen a semitrailer taking a corner will remember that the trailer wheels take a tighter line than the truck's wheels, thus the offending spud cartage vehicle's trailer was even further over the centre line.
Shouldn't have been too much of an issue.
It was at about this point that the driver decided he probably should be in his lane and steered the truck accordingly.
This is when another physics demonstration occured.
When a semi is travelling around a bend and makes a sudden change in direction into the opposite of the one it was travelling in, the trailer has a tendency to jacknife, or go sideways.
The already friendly trailer became even more affectionate towards me, leaving me two choices:
1) try and lean the bike further and risk dropping it ( which would send me and the bike under the wheels)
2) try and steer the bike towards the side of the tyres and hopefully "bounce" off the side
Yes viewers, he's chosen number 2!!!!!
The result was a bit of a mixture of the two.
The bike got sucked under & run over by the trailer, I "bounced" off the side much like a rag doll does when you throw it at the side of a semitrailer.
End result is: 12 broken bones ( don't even know how many actual fractures ), one written off motorcycle and some expensive riding gear made useless thanks to some crafty cutting by the paramedics.
Hence the early hibernation and lying in bed for weeks with large doses of morphine. ( I can see why they don't bother decorating walls and ceilings in hospitals, with enough pills and morph. they don't need to! )
to be continued...............
I'm writing this on a laptop kindly lent to me by science officer / i.t. officer Brenton as I have been forced into early hibernation for this winter.
Unlike the moomins, I haven't gutsed myself on pine needles, opting for large doses of morphine to ease myself into the endless weeks of lying snugly in bed.
Remembering how the weekend in the Grampians National Park I was thinking my fitness levels weren't quite up to scratch, a new fitness regime was in order. One that perhaps involved quitting smoking even!
We all met up at Allan's place and before we could get out of greater Melbourne area the solution was thrust into my consciousness!
EXTREME RUGBY TRAINING!!!!!
A good rugby player will posses a certain amount of strength & stamina, so why not take it one notch further. Seeing as I didn't have a rugby side at my disposal to practice scrums or tackles I went for the next best thing.....the side of a semi trailer.
Maybe I was a bit too keen to rectify my current fittness deficiency and chosen one that wasn't moving........probably would have been a good idea to get off the motorbike first too. So kids, don't try that one at home, alright!
As I entered a left hand bend, I was greeted by a semitrailer carting potatoes. Nothing unusual there except for its front wheel being over the centre line and making progress towards me at a great rate of knots!
Now, becoming a bonnet ornament on some spud truckie's pride & joy held about as much appeal as running into that large escaped rapist, I saw on crimestoppers, in a dark alleyway.
So I deftly cut the corner in order to continue on my merry little way. All good bar some elements of physics, which were about to make themselves very troublesome.
Anyone who's ever seen a semitrailer taking a corner will remember that the trailer wheels take a tighter line than the truck's wheels, thus the offending spud cartage vehicle's trailer was even further over the centre line.
Shouldn't have been too much of an issue.
It was at about this point that the driver decided he probably should be in his lane and steered the truck accordingly.
This is when another physics demonstration occured.
When a semi is travelling around a bend and makes a sudden change in direction into the opposite of the one it was travelling in, the trailer has a tendency to jacknife, or go sideways.
The already friendly trailer became even more affectionate towards me, leaving me two choices:
1) try and lean the bike further and risk dropping it ( which would send me and the bike under the wheels)
2) try and steer the bike towards the side of the tyres and hopefully "bounce" off the side
Yes viewers, he's chosen number 2!!!!!
The result was a bit of a mixture of the two.
The bike got sucked under & run over by the trailer, I "bounced" off the side much like a rag doll does when you throw it at the side of a semitrailer.
End result is: 12 broken bones ( don't even know how many actual fractures ), one written off motorcycle and some expensive riding gear made useless thanks to some crafty cutting by the paramedics.
Hence the early hibernation and lying in bed for weeks with large doses of morphine. ( I can see why they don't bother decorating walls and ceilings in hospitals, with enough pills and morph. they don't need to! )
to be continued...............
