MOOMINS M.C.

It is done.
My first two rolls of film have been digested by Teh 'Hoff.
I don't know what possessed me to jump in the photographic deep end like that, well more like the photographic Marianas Trench really, with no scuba gear or even floaties.
Not having shot a Hasselblad before, not having shot manually with film, not having shot a model or portrait, all these things made for a very nerve wracking experience last Thursday.
I was as giddy as a teenager about to get laid for the first time and considering the model hadn't modelled before, that made us both photographic virgins of the highest order.
The expectations were high, the skills to pay the bills were low, the location unfamiliar, I was wielding a tool I'd never shot in front of anyone, aaarrrrghhh!!!!

I've just picked up the 12 colour and 12 b&w prints from that session.
Out of the 24 shots there are possibly 1 or two that I find acceptable and 2 more that kind of work on a more artistic rather than technical level.
All the photos had some element that I really liked and was trying to incorporate into the portrait, but never seemed to appear together in the one frame damn it!!!
The one thing that did work out was my timing of it all.
I managed to allocate the right amount of time for the costume selection / fitting, time to get to the location, time to set up, do the shoot & pack down and time to get to the photo processing lab to drop off the films.
Apart from the unfortunate lighting, which goes into the 6 P's category ( planning & preparation prevents piss poor performance ) I felt I couldn't have prepared myself better really.
I'd learnt A LOT during that shoot.

Initially I had a bit of trouble finding the right location and in the end chose one that I felt 'would have to do'.
Everything about it was good with the exception of one thing and that was a pesky halogen down light that I couldn't turn off.
It cast awful shadows all over the model and made it really difficult to get the kind of poses I was after.
There was nothing for it, I just had work around it as best as I could with my limited skills and knowledge.

I picked Sarah to model for me as I felt she was very photogenic.
She's a barmaid at 'the place that sells bad beer' and also a dancer ( not exotic Mr Bananas ).
Sarah was a joy to work with and looked fab in the 1920's flapper outfit.
I found out why those pro model photographer spew forth all that 'You look great honey, show me more rowrwrrr, oh yeah, now a little more to the side, oh yeah baby that's great!' malarkey.
The model has no idea what you want them to do so it's up to the photographer to communicate everything, be it verbally or non verbally.
I found that whole aspect quite challenging, but thankfully Sarah was just awesome to work with.

I made little notes in a pad for future reference.
Things like type of film used, shutter speed & aperture setting.
With digital photography all that information is stored with every photo and I can look it up at will and learn form it, but with film I have to be meticulous about recording the settings if I am to have any hope gaining anything from past mistakes.

I left the colour film for scanning at the lab and will have that later in the week, so fear not that you will miss out on this celluloid goodness, it will be coming to you live and exclusive on the Moomins M.C. blog very shortly.
Hopefully in less time than it has taken me to write another post since the one a week ago.

Whilst talking with the cats in the photo lab I realised just how ignorant I am when it comes to film photography and that has cemented my decision to find an appropriate training course to attend.
And so begins another chapter in the Zuba's truck smash recovery, discovery of photography, pursuit of photographic excellence, etc, blah blah blah.


Thursday I finally watched the final episode of Lost.
That show drives me batty!!
It's the most ludicrous audio visual offering since Death Race 2000.
I waited for my mate Keli to come back from Fiji as he hadn't seen it either and when the show first aired in Australia we made a pact to stick with it to the end.
Now I have to wait until next year because there's another season!!!!!
AARrggghhhhHHHH!!!!


Sunday was another heat of the greater Brunswick area Roast Off II.
Bec came out fighting with a pork roast, crackling + gravy and all, with forked baked spuds, pumpkin and beans with lemon and sliced almonds.
Following up with an apple crumble and vanilla ice cream.
Mmmmmm delish!!!
Onya Bec!


A new arrival to my blog roll is the comedienne Lucy from over stateside.
She's the one who put me onto the term Metabigotry.
Lucy's asked to do an interview with me, around the topic of comedy, which should be pretty cool.
Admittedly I do enjoy a good bit of comedy, the best abs workout you can get with your pants on I reckon.
I even entertained the notion of getting up for an open comedy mic night, but managed to talk myself out of it, who knows, maybe one day.
My mates tell me I'm funny, but in that way where they slowly back away with one eyebrow raised.


On the medical front, I've rang the Alfred hospital yesterday to see how my appointment for a plastics review was progressing only to be told there is no trace on the system at all.
I then phoned my ortho surgeon to see if he could shed some light on the situation and was informed by his secretary that he has indeed spoken with plastics dept. recently and things are rolling again.
I might just give the plastics another call tomorrow to find out if I'm back on the system.

Physio has been the usual drudgery, but there is talk of releasing me into a public gym sometime after my next surgery.
Good thing that, and even better considering my psychologist recently pronounced me safe to be in public by myself and gave me permission to use metal cutlery,with food only.
Nah but seriously, she reckons I don't need to see her at this point in time, which to me is a darn good thang!!!
So things are all swell at the moment!

That leads me to my next little announcement: I've found Snorkmaiden!
If you are not familiar with the Snorkmaiden you can find some information here, look for the one with a flower in the hand ;)


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Ladies, gentlemen and others, it is my great pleasure to announce the arrival of my new camera.
By new I mean a 1967 Hasselblad 500C, otherwise known as the bees knees or the ducks nuts.
It looks a little like a 1967 Chevrolet I reckon, except it's Swedish.
Maybe a 1967 Volvo?
Anyways, from here on it shall be known and referred to as Teh 'Hoff, short for The Hasselhoff.
I just bought some rolls of film today and will be using Teh 'Hoff in anger on Thursday for a portrait of a one of the barmaids from 'the place that sells bad beer'.
Hoping it all works out well.
Camera - check, film - check, barmaid - check, barmaid's costume - check, venue confirmation - check, any idea how to use the camera - ahhh, still working on that one.
Still trying to get in contact with my orthopaedic surgeon to do a portrait of him as well.

Went to a game of the Australian Rugby Union Championship on Saturday night and had an absolute ball!!!
The Melbourne Rebels defeated the East Coast Aces 34 to 24 and overall it was a pretty good game.
It's good to see this championship starting as it means we'll be able to see some Union action in this fair, but Australian Rules Football dominated city.
Good on ya Richard for organising the tickets and our motley crew.


As promised here are some more piccies that I've finally edited.
I've only uploaded them as small, because it takes forever to do them in large size and I can't be arsed waiting that long.
Yeah, I'm a slacker like that.
You can however click on them to view in full screen size, some of them need to be enlarged to get the full effect.
Enjoy ;)





















































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Back with a vengeance!! And a camera!!
Well, I'm getting some of my energy back at least.
Still coughing like cat with a razor wire furball, but at least my abs have gotten a good work out.
After being sent home from work Monday last week, in fear of infecting the greater workforce in my building, I took the next two days off.
Tuesday's physio and hydro sessions were cancelled along with the visit to the my old home, the rehab hospital, to catch up with my old cellmate Damian.
Work on Wednesday was off the books as well and the only place I did visit was the local doctor to get a fully sick certificate for work.
She wasn't able to help much, but did insist on prescribing some antibiotics, to which I informed her that due to the amount of antibiotics I'd ingested during my hospital stay I had serious reservations about their effectiveness.
I did however make an appearance at trivia night and felt it was worthwhile as we won by two points and I did answer 3 questions that no one else knew the answer to.
Yay for my sick little brain coming up with the goods when it's really important!


After an alcohol soaked Friday night at 'the place that sell bad beer' I went home with a couple of mates and gave the record player a workout.
This was the first time I'd cut the rug since before my smash.
I did have a dance once before, but I was a full card carrying member of the C.R.A.F.T club ( can't remember a fucking thing ) that night, and it resulted in my redecorating the carpet in a nice tone of blood, stemming from a cut lip as I apparently faceplanted in the music room.
I must say I really enjoyed myself and even with some alcoholically impaired co-ordination I managed to stay upright this time.
I didn't throw up in the laundry trough or my bedroom floor this time either, unlike one of my mates who for all intents and purposes sounded pretty much what I would imagine Cerberus, the 3 headed hell hound that guards hell, must sound like when in full flight.


Saturday morning was a very exciting time for me.
I'd had two cameras slip out of my grasp on ebay, due to my being completely ebay challenged.
This time however things were different and the item I was bidding on attracted no other bidders, so ebay nil, me 1!!!!!
My latest pride and joy is a second hand Hasselblad 500c, or the Hasselhoff as I prefer to call it.
It is the business end of photography equipment and was good enough to be used on the lunar landings.
The 'Hoff came with a spare film back, lens hood and two rolls of film for a steal of $800!!!
The remainder of my budget can now be used to purchase another lens.
I have no freaking idea how to use it yet, but that will be a learning curve I'm very much looking forward to.
Already, the square frame format has me looking at photo composition in a completely different way.


Sunday it was my turn to host the 'Roast Off'.
The Roast Off is a competitive roast that is held every two weeks at six different households in the greater Brunswick area.
My sis, another feller and I ran this a few years ago ( before the glory of Iron Chef graced our tv screens ) and it was a hell of a lot of fun.
Basic concept is that the competition revolves around the roast.
What you roast and what you serve with it is irrelevant, as long as the main feature piece is roasted.
Two weeks ago at the inaugural heat of Roast Off II, I accused the host Richard of cheating as he was getting help form Bec, who is quite handy with a kitchen. ( By help I mean she did practically everything! )
I do believe I likened the episode to the culinary equivalent of cyclists blood doping in le Tour de France.
And so the pressure was on to come up with something that would justify my supposed sledging.
I wanted to steer clear of the usual beef, chicken and lamb and wanted something more exotic.
Roadkill kangaroo was on the cards as it's free and already tenderised, however fresh roadkill is not in abundance in suburban Melbourne and I wasn't prepared to scour the countryside for the suitable / unfortunate fauna.
I did consider some old leather saddle bags, but I don't believe I am adept enough in the culinary arts to pull that one off.
Next on the cards was the prehistoric, but the snag I ran into here was that crocodile, goanna and snake are as rare as cats in Footscray. ( a Melbourne suburb with a large asian population )
Ooh, I do believe that is metabigotry!!
I finally settled on Barramundi, because it is in fact a very prehistoric kind of fish.
Ugly little bugger too.
So here is MY OWN experimental recipe for Barra with bush stuffing:

Get yerself a fresh ( not frozen ) Barra, stuff the inside of it with fresh cut up mountain pepper leaves, crushed macadamia nuts, a couple of slices of butter, crushed garlic and some peeled sunrise limes.
Pop an unpeeled sunrise lime in the Barra's mouth for visuals, rub the fish down with olive oil and roast the hell out of it in a hot oven, until you can easily push a wooden skewer into it without resistance.
Now a roast wouldn't be complete without some vegies, so I grated up some pink eye potatoes, sweet potato and butternut pumpkin, threw in some crushed garlic, salt and pepper along with carraway seeds, made them into little balls / patties and deep fried them to within an inch of their little vegetable lives.
Must thank Annemarie for helping with the peeling of the finnicky limes and the cooking of the vegie balls, couldn't have done it without ya!
End result was a very tasty prehistoric animal with a native / bush flavour.
As one of the connoisseurs pointed out "The vegies were grate!"
Boom Boom!!!!
Desert came courtesy of Bec, thanks mate :) in the form of some delicious cup cakes with lemon and coconut soft icing which she'd prepared earlier, matched with some strawberries I'd purchased from the shop four doors down.
Tasty!!!!!!




I have been getting the run around from the TAC ( the mob that funds my recovery ) in regards to funding for the psychologist.
Usual bureaucratic bullshit, which unfortunately has thrown a spanner in the works.
Hopefully get that sorted out soon, though as I don't fancy having to pay for it myself, especially considering my need for it is a direct result of the smash.


I've also been talking to the Alfred Hospital trauma centre in regards to arranging a review with the plastic surgeon about replacing the the migratory calf muscle back into it's rightful position.
They don't rush things in the country, and neither do they in the public hospital system it would appear.
As soon as I can get the review then the next surgery to remove most of my internal titanium and stainless steel scaffolding can be scheduled.
I was told that if I don't hear from them in two weeks I should contact them again.
You can bet yer sweet butt I will be ringing them every few days just to annoy them, in order to get this bloody operation out of the way as soon as possible.


I picked the camera up yesterday at a pre agreed location, corner of Church and Victoria streets in Abbotsford / Richmond, an area where amongst some very fine vietnamese cuisine one can also purchase various illicit drugs rather easily.
As I trammed my way down there I gave her a call to confirm our meeting, at which point she asked me what I was wearing.
I felt this was rather forward of the girl as she'd never even met me, until she pointed out that she needed to identify me upon arrival.
I got to the location and sat on the bench to kill some time with my tram book.
It must have looked pretty dodgy when the girl turned up with an alluminium case and plonked it down on the bench next to my backpack.
After unlocking the case and opening it, the merchandise was offered for inspection.
It all seemed in good condition and I produced a plain envelope containing the $800 dollars in unmarked $50 bills.
"I think you'll find it's all in order." I said as I handed the cash over.
After counting, the girl gave a satisfied smile and I closed the case.
To anyone walking past, it must have looked like a regular occurrence in the area and we completed our transaction without incident.
After asking her why she was selling such a fine piece of equipment I was informed that she was 'going digital' due to the cost of film and processing.
I offered her some advice in this field as I do know a little about it and gave a her play with my digital SLR.
We parted company and the 'Hoff now lives at Clarence Street.
Woo hoo!!!
All I have to do now is learn how the damned thing works.


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I don't know what happened on the weekend, but I picked up the dreaded lurgy.
Since Saturday I've been sicker than Bob Flanagan.
Well not quite that sick.
Not like I've been shoving baseballs up my arse or 6 inch bails through my penis, but pretty crook none the less.
My head's been throbbing harder than a honeymooner's dick and my nose and lungs have been engaged in a steady production of unsavoury body fluids, with the snot and lung butter constantly trying to make their escape at the most inconvenient moments, like when I'm trying to sleep.
The fever took hold and I'd been sweating like a paedophile in a playground, which didn't help my sleeping attempts either.
At least this time I was in my own bed and not post surgery like a year ago.

I did go to work on Monday, but was persuaded by my colleagues to go home at lunch time.
Glad I listened to them as I just got progressively worse as the day wore on.
I think I worked out a way to pass the time though.
Rugged up on the couch watching cinematic masterpieces like: 'Queen of the Amazons', 'The Wasp Woman' and 'She Gods of Shark Reef'.
Drinking orange juice by the pint and slowly destroying a rainforest in Borneo in the form of a box of Kleenex tissues are par for the course too.
Recommended listening for this kind of condition: Showbiz by Muse, Doremi Fasol Latido & In Search Of Space by Hawkwind, Dub Side Of The Moon by the Easy Star All-Stars.
Worse part was that the joint ache associated with this sort if disease became somewhat accentuated due to my many internal orthopaedic modifications, sucks to be me but hey, could always be worse.


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I have been really slack ( electronically ) lately, I think I may have overloaded my online fuse.
No blog posting or reading, no photo uploads to DeviantArt, not even any browsing for ridiculous interweb stuff, even email has taken a backseat of late.
If I've been missing from your comments or sitemeter then you know why, I'll be back very soon.
I haven't even been editing photos, although I haven't stopped taking them.
About the only thing I have been checking for is secondhand Hasselblad cameras on ebay.
A couple have slipped out of my grasp due to my my being a complete noob in regards to ebay, which pissed me off no end as they were both bargains.
I've been a bit crook lately and work and physio have been taking their toll as well, but that's still not an excuse I feel.


Anyways, the psych sessions have been interesting in the sense that I had no idea what to expect from them and am now finding that a course has been set from which I don't feel I can stray.
Where it'll take me I don't know, but then again in the the true spirit of Moomins M.C. I really don't care, we'll just see in time.


A week ago I had organised what I would refer to as a cripple convention.
David had just had surgery on his remaining arm and I wanted to visit him as we hadn't seen each other for a while.
At the same time I thought it would be a good chance for Al to meet David and have a chat about what it's like losing an arm and how to cope with everyday challenges.
Seeing as Mark lived just around the corner I picked him up as well and we had ourselves a wee little 'cripple convention'.
David rolled out his fancy pants 'Luke Skywalker' artificial arm for Al to check out.
It's a pretty wild unit with interchangeable claw and hand, the claw able to inflict some serious pain when closed around your finger, and the hand does this great thing where it starts rotating and then just goes round and around in a most unnatural way.
He is still getting to terms with controlling it, but these things take time.